The Rheumatologist

The office is quiet as I sit here waiting to meet my new specialist.  I cannot help but think…  damn, this is how the world might be from now on, all of us wearing masks, staying six feet apart, walking into sparse rooms with the allowed number of people…  Oh, and how can I forget being approached by a masked, gloved nurse to have my temperature taken upon entering the building.  If all this was not stressful enough, there is the reason I am here in the first place;  to meet the newest member of my medical team, the highly recommended rheumatologist, to add another piece to the puzzle of my dysfunctional body.  I want my quality of life back… 

  So here I am in my N95 mask, waiting to meet Dr. Bones (no names or centers will be released in this post).  My heart and mind are racing.   I have so many questions!  I have been prepping for this appointment for over two months.  At a glance, I might appear calm as I sit with my notebook placed on my lap until you notice one of my legs bouncing up and down.  Breath! I tell myself.   The door opens slowly and a petite, dark-haired, very young woman walks in (wearing a mask of course).   “Hi, I am Dr. Bones”.   She sits down and immediately starts to review my medical records.  There are almost no words exchanged,  but it is okay.   I felt she was really trying to make sense of the numbers before her;  maybe something has been overlooked in my previous labs, or maybe there is a false negative.  Whatever the case might be,  Dr. Bones put on gloves and started the trigger point test.  It took only a second before she touched my arms causing me to jump.  I told her to stop.  It felt like sharp razors were being dragged along my skin.  My body’s immediate reaction was to give me goosebumps and put me on high alert to protect myself- as if I was experiencing major physical trauma.  She cautiously continued as she monitored my reactions.  She broke her silence and confirmed the speculations of my other doctors.  She told me I had a very severe case of fibromyalgia that probably started with my birth and accelerated with certain events during the first few years of my life (you can read about that in a previous post).  So it seems,  at a very early age my nerve endings were already heightened and more receptive to developing fibromyalgia later in life.  Then, when you sprinkle on more physical trauma as the year’s pass, it leads to nerve endings that are angry and ready to cause unbelievable pain for no reason in the blink of an eye. The worst part is it will continue for the rest of my life!   UNACCEPTABLE!!!     

  I should be ending here with one of the most painful of all diagnoses of fibromyalgia,  but there is more to tell my doctor.   I describe an extreme pain in my spine that makes loud, deep cracks when I move a certain way.  Without a word, she ended the physical exam today.  With pen in hand and an intense look on her face,  the rheumatologist began writing several pages worth of lab tests, x-rays, and scans that would need to be completed before our next visit.  Though I will be proactive and get all my testing done,  technically,  I am in a state of limbo until my next appointment.  So, to be continued…  





Disclaimer: No portion of this may be shared without my written permission and used as your own.

4 responses to “The Rheumatologist”

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